In Cuckolding: A Brief Introduction, I introduce cuckolding as one of my favorite sexual fantasies, offered a core definition that applies to all forms of cuckolding, described the rising popularity of this kink (e.g., #2 most searched for sexual content on the internet), and ended by identifying some additional kinks often layered onto cuckolding. If you haven’t already read this post, I hope you will go back and give it a read.

I hesitantly admit my cuckold desires because of how this kink is commonly portrayed in the world of porn. The cuckold often portrayed as a weak, undesirable man wearing panties that enjoys being berated and humiliated by a dominant woman while he is “forced” to watch her fuck other men. While some cuckolds may harbor such fantasies (and that is okay), porn’s portrayal of cuckolding doesn’t accurately capture the essence of cuckolding nor does it reflect my cuckold fantasy.

That said, my cuckold fantasy isn’t the essence of cuckolding either. So, my exploration of cuckolding continues with two overarching objectives: 1) Understand the core essence of cuckolding that applies to all cuckolds 2) Understand the erotic layers of my cuckold fantasy as well as other common erotic layers frequently associated with cuckolding

Definition and Critical Attributes

What exactly is cuckolding? The meaning of “cuckold” has evolved over time and today we understand it as a term referring to a sexual kink/fetish in which the man is stimulated by his emotionally committed partner having sex with another man or men. In its purest form, cuckolding involves three elements. We have a couple that is emotionally committed to one another, the cuckold’s lover is having sex with another man or men, and this arrangement is exciting for the couple. Beyond this core definition, the fantasy explodes wildly into many different spaces and often becomes a fetish within a fetish.

Takes One to Know One

Adult dating sites and other websites are full of couples looking for other men to fuck the wife or girlfriend. I know this because there was a time when I fulfilled this desire for couples. In American Gigolo: Rise I describe my first encounter with a couple and that experience soon launched me into another world of sexual intrigue and exploration. I knew what I was doing and, in a world where willing men were a dime a dozen, I was a “preferred male” in relatively high demand by couples.

The odd thing about this journey as an “American Gigolo”, Alpha, or Bull is that it felt like an out-of-body experience. It felt like I was an actor performing my role in a play. Looking back on that period, playing a role is exactly what I was doing and should have been doing. Cuckolding is truly erotic theater with the cuckold, bull, and hotwife/cuckoldress each playing their role. A key element missing for me in these experiences was the emotional connection. That was something very special shared by the cuckold and his lover.

I was also extremely curious about cuckolding and wanted to observe and experience it up close but from a safe emotional distance. As an “Alpha” I was able to see how real cuckold couples experienced the fantasy and learn from them…while of course fucking another man’s wife (which was also quite exciting). While it was fascinating and very erotic, I felt disconnected from the experience. I can be very naughty but I am first and foremost a sensual man. I prefer to layer my naughty side on top of a deep sensual connection. Being the third wheel in the sexual adventures of a couple, the sensual connection that I crave was often missing.